Our delinquent age needs to regain its sense of the urgency of enforcing parental discipline.
As a means to that end, let us look at two Bible-named fathers and the harvest they reaped.
We meet the first father, Eli, in 1 Samuel 2. At this point in Israel’s history,
Eli’s sons are serving as priests, and Eli himself is serving as both high priest and judge.
“Now Eli was very old, and heard all that his suns did unto all Israel….And he said unto them,
Why do ye such things? For I hear of your evil dealings by all this people. Nay, my sons; for it
is no good report that I hear: ye make the Lord’s people to transgress.” (1 Samuel 2:22-24)
Eli appears to have been a weak, easygoing father. Although he did verbally protest against
the dishonest and immoral conduct of his sons, he took no further measures nor even threatened
to remove them from office. With Eli, this had probably become a lifelong pattern. When those
sons were yet boys, he had probably protested many of their actions. “Boys, that is wrong; you
should know better!” But evidently he seldom insisted on their obedience. Words without action
prove very ineffective.
The inspired account then tells of God sending an unnamed prophet to Eli. His message is one
of divine judgment reflecting the seriousness with which God viewed the situation. Eli is severely
indicted. “Wherefore kick ye at my sacrifice and at mine offering, which I have commanded in my
habitation; and honourest thy sons above me, to make yourselves fat with the chiefest of all the
offerings of Israel my people?” (1 Samuel 2:29). Eli evidently wanted to stay on good terms with
his sons, but in essence he was siding with them against God. Included in the prophet’s message
of judgment was the announcement that Eli’s two sons were soon to die, both in one day.
Furthermore, all Eli’s posterity was doomed to “die in the flower of their age.”
In chapter 3 we hear God delivering warning number two through the boy Samuel. “And the Lord
said to Samuel, Behold, I will do a thing in Israel, that which both the ears of every one that heareth
it shall tingle. In that day I will perform against Eli all things which I have spoken concerning his
house: when I begin, I will also make an end. For I have told him that I will judge his house for
ever for the iniquity which he knoweth; because his sons made themselves vile, and he restrained
them not.” (1 Samuel 3:11-13). It is made emphatically clear that God held Eli responsible for not
restraining his sons. His failure to ever remove them from office reflects his earlier failures to
restrain them by any means. Eli did not sense the urgency of enforcing parental discipline.
It is important that one sees the relation between Eli’s failure to restrain his sons and their not
knowing the Lord (1 Samuel 2:12). That child who is not trained in the habit of obedience
makes very poor material for the kingdom of God. For any child who disobeys his parents and
repeatedly gets by with it will find it extremely difficult to ever meekly surrender to the lordship
of Christ and the authority He delegates to His Church.
In contrast, those who are well trained from early infancy are at the same time being conditioned
for saying, in all the great crises of life, “Not my will, but Thine, be done.” It is this necessary
conditioning that adds to the urgency of enforcing parental discipline.
One may console himself in the fact that he or she, as a parent, is not at all wicked. But to simply
be a weak parent can very definitely contribute to the permanent wickedness of one’s children
and possibly make one partaker of their sins.
King David is another father from whom we should learn. Toward at least one of his sons, he
was entirely too permissive. This became evident at the point where David’s son Solomon became
heir to the throne according to previous plans. At that juncture, another son of David, Adonijah,
made a bold bid for the throne and thus knowingly defied the wishes of his father.
“Then Adonijah the son of Haggith [one of David’s wives] exalted himself, saying, I will be king:
and he prepared him chariots and horsemen, and fifty men to run before him. And his father had
not displeased him at any time saying, Why hast thou done so? And he conferred with Joab the
son of Zeruiah, and with Abiathar the priest: and they following Adonijah helped him” (1 Kings 1:5-7).
Nathan, the prophet of God, when he learned of Adonijah’s plot, went into action immediately.
“Wherefore Nathan then spake unto Bath-sheba the mother of Solomon, saying, Has thou not
heard that Adonijah the son of Haggith doth reign, and David our lord knoweth it not? Now
therefore come, let me, I pray thee, give thee counsel, that thou mayest save thine own life,
and the life of thy son Solomon. Go and get thee in unto king David, and say unto him, Didst not
thou, my lord, O king, swear unto thine handmaid, saying, Assuredly Solomon thy son shall reign
after me, and he shall sit upon my throne? Why then doth Adonijah reign? Behold, while thou
yet talkest there with the king, I also will come in after thee, and confirm thy words” (1 Kings 1:11-14).
Obediently Bathsheba followed Nathan’s instructions. David, at that point, rallied enough to issue a
royal command calling for the immediate anointing of Solomon as king in his place. The news of this
decisive counteraction soon reached Adonijah and his companions. "And all the guests that were
with Adonijah were afraid, and rose up, and went every man his way. And Adonijah feared because
of Solomon, and arose, and went, and caught hold on the horns of the alter" (1 Kings 1:49,20).
The verses that follow show Solomon mercifully sparing the life of Adonijah. But after David’s death,
Adonijah made another unwise move that aroused Solomon’s suspicion, and on that occasion Solomon
issued an order for Adonijah to be slain at once, and he was.
Why did Adonijah so boldly assert himself, and knowingly defy his father’s plan? It stems back to the
fact that David, his father, “had not displeased him at any time in saying, why has thou not done so?”
(1 Kings 1:6). Throughout Adonijah’s childhood and youth, David allowed him to repeatedly have his
own way. This kind of parental delinquency is bound to bear bitter fruit. Although David was an
otherwise good man, a man after God’s own heart, he clearly spoiled this son, Adonijah. Consequently,
there were many heartaches, and finally the premature cutting off of a life that otherwise might have
been a glory to God.
The truth of Proverbs 29:15 has been verified repeatedly. “The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a
child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame” (and also his father). Here, then, are two fathers
who in other respects lived commendable lives, but they did not feel the burden of the urgency of
enforcing parental discipline. And out of that neglect grew a long train of tragic consequences.
In any sizable group of parents, there will likely be some inclined to be overly harsh, and still more
inclined to be overly permissive. Both extremes militate against the effectiveness of disciplinary measures.~
Taken from the booklet printed by Rod and Staff Publishers, Inc., Crocket, KY 41413.
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